Internet Stranger Neil

This week we talk to internet stranger Neil who used to be living in a rainforest and now he only has one coat in his closet! 
Sound Supervisor B.T. Measles. 
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Transcript

Unknown: 0:08

Hello and welcome to the podcast pursuit of happiness. I'm your host Marta and this week we talked to internet stranger Neil, and we discuss things like how death by shark is the coolest way to die. And how avocado makes a great base for an ice cream. So stay tuned we're gonna start with our icebreaker. Okay. Have you ever sent a dick pic? No. Good. No way that would appeal to as anyone asks you for one. Also, no. Yeah, I there have been people who have said that they've been I don't understand that. But you know what? Whoever that works for some people, okay. It's consensual. Okay, but yes. Okay. Otherwise, get out of here. Yeah, just more effective things you could send like pictures of a cat. Yeah, yes, I would. I would. Definitely would respond much better to a cat than a penis. But that's just me. Okay, we're gonna ask you some questions to help the audience get to know you a little bit better. Me? I don't know you. So, what's your favorite movie? Or the last movie you watched? And did you like it or not? Um, oh, the last movie I watched was in Konto. Oh, God, it was very colorful. I think it was light hearted. And that was nice. Yeah. Um, the other thing I watched recently was the beginning of the Wheel of Time series, which was not as good as I hoped. But maybe other people like it. I hope. I've heard good things about Wheel of Time. I've watched incanto probably 10 times because I take care of a child and she's obsessed with it. So I had that movie memorized. Now, basically, I'm mostly I think I like my problem with the movie is I'm really jealous of the kid who has an entire rain forest. Yeah. I want to know. I want to know what's in the like, strong girls room. Is it just a gym? That's boring. Everybody else just has crappy rooms out show us but the kid with the rainforest room lucked out with his magic. Really talking to animals. That's fine, but like, rainforest room? Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Favorite music if you have a favorite band or fear on Spotify, your number one artist or song or whatever? I mean, number one artists just last year who was that? I think she cares always really high up there. I Shakira Yeah, she's had incredible music for like, way longer than I care to think about so yeah, Kira. I also like glass animals, like apparently everyone else. That is, honestly lots of people's. I'm surprised. I thought it was kind of like the niche. I also thought that Hmm. Interesting. too. Cool. Okay, and what is your job? But don't tell us where you work? Oh, I am. It depends on the season. But usually I work as like a botanist or biologist or something like that. Oh, cool. Yeah, it kind of depends on the year. Okay. Sounds like interesting. Okay, our last our last question. And you can interpret this however you feel. What's wrong with you think clearly, it's that I don't have enough coats. Like, yeah, do you own one coat? I own at least 10. And clearly if I if I had enough coats, I wouldn't feel the void in my soul. So I need to code. Just a quick little aside here, I realized that I did not explain why we were talking about coats. Neil was recording his side of the podcast inside his closet, where there was only one coat. And so that's what we're talking about here. Enjoy. Winter clearance is coming up. This is this is going to be the year for sure. This is the time you're gonna buy more out that is when I will enroll myself with my emotional crutch and self until the summertime. Okay, what kind of coats we talking about just like regular. So I've got puffy coats, coats, work sweaters, old coats from the 70s just a lot of things probably none of which are fashionable all which I love. So yeah, yeah, I also, you know what, I think there's something wrong with me where I just have too many coats. And it's because I love buying weird, weird like, you can find awesome Pendleton's on like vintage sites for like $30. And they're really warm and cool. So that's so we will talk about these vintage sites or Pendleton's because I don't actually have anything Pendleton yet. Oh, well, I have I actually have a few and I might just be lucky. Who knows. Okay. Now that we know you, I'm gonna ask you, we're gonna move on to our next segment, which is called over, over generalized questions for men. Basically, what's gonna happen is you're gonna answer these questions that I've found on the internet and found on social media and you're answering on behalf of all men, so consider this Well, sorry. I have a big stack here and I'm just gonna pull randomly. Okay. Okay. That's a dumb one. I don't want to ask that one. Okay. Um, why dad jokes? Why don't jokes? Yeah. I mean, are you are you a fan of dad jokes? I love dad jokes. I'm just I feel like betrayed to all men right now because I don't have a dad joke right? Why would you consider a dad joke like what's the definition of a dad joke? just dumb. A dad joke is something where it's clever but it also wants you make wants you makes you want to die at least for a few seconds. Okay, yeah. And it but you're cursed with the knowledge of the burden Yeah and again Yeah. And why do you think they have such a hold on on the on men well knock knock jokes that working about 15 years ago so yeah. Then we do we can man I don't have a dad joke radio about it's okay. You'll have I think you'll have opportunities as this goes on. So sure. Okay. So that what's your answer? Why why we do it it's just a it's just a natural thing. I would say I would say that a lot of men to some extent or another are opportunists in some way. So yeah, a dad joke isn't something that you think of beforehand? No, it is something you think beforehand and then finally when situation that you Yeah, like in the you're like shower scenarios, you're imagining a conversation finally, when that happens, you have one ready you take the you use it, don't want to waste shower thoughts. That is that's what I do with like fights, but I never use the cool mean things. I think of the shower, but I pick him up all the time. I just I don't fight that often. So we'll say that's why I'm okay. Next question. Do you feel bad for making Megan Fox a sex symbol when that's not the way she intended her career to go? Is that a question for all men? Yeah. I don't know. I feel like she's actually pretty much diversified herself, right like Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. If you like, MEGAN Oh, yeah. shifted right. She's like redefining yourself. She's like, you know what? I define me in these freakish turtles also define me in some way. Yeah. So this is where we're at. She got out of it. I never saw that. So I can't say I don't think that I've watched much of her recent her recent acting but good for her. I think she did you know what she was on New Girl. And I liked her and that she wasn't like, overly sexy, so good for her. So you're saying you didn't you might have done it, but she got herself out of it. Good for me. Definitely. As a teenager, I thought she was very, very attractive. And yeah. Oh, but she's clearly more than just one image of her. Yeah. I haven't seen much of her lately, but Me and my friend have a bet going on that she's gonna in the next 10 years she's going to do something like Oscar worthy, but she's gotta get done with this like Machine Gun Kelly, like they can get married and stuff, but like, once everybody's like, okay, cool. We've seen you, and then she'll move on to her Oscar worthy thing. Right? For example, like Could she be an upcoming character in the upcoming weed out biopic with Daniel red? Oh, God. I mean, I personally like that would be like a really good twist. And they're like, Megan Fox shows up like it's all coming together. Yeah, I actually would love that. I'm very excited for this movie. And the best is that just he's Daniel Radcliffe is so short. And and weird. I was like five inches taller than him. I just, I love Daniel Radcliffe. Good for him. He's such a. He talked about somebody bustin out of the one role that he was supposed to play that that guy's doing everything now. You should watch anything. If you if you haven't seen Swiss Army, man. Get on top of that. I see what you did there. Oh, man, I I've heard the stories of Swiss Army Man. Also the one where he has like, he's like he's grown horns. Yeah, there was one where he had guns. Guns like, nailed into his hands. Yeah, he's just everything. Okay. Okay, no. Do you have something to add to Daniel? Yes. I feel like only like he can only be rivaled by perhaps weird owl and maybe Nick Cage. So yeah. I, I love his career. I love it for him. Okay, last question of this segment. Why do all men want women to be poor than you? Poor? make less money than I understand. I'm just asking the question. I would argue that given my recipe, low income I for one job want this? Because that will be very low indeed. I don't know. I think a lot of guys feel threatened by almost anything. So that could be it. Just yeah, God will say. I think that's I think that's a pretty good. That's a pretty good guess. I would say pretty spot on. Yeah. I mean, like, if we're splitting more things at restaurants, I would maybe go out to eat more than once every three years. So yeah, every one and a half years. You know, what if? If, what if women made way more money than they probably I don't know. I pay for a lot. my fair share of dates. I'm sure Martha I'm sure. If I make more money, I'll pay for more of those dates. One thing that's been clear to me is that we all should be making significantly more money. Yes, I agree with that. When let's all just have way more money. That will be great. That would be like any money. Some of like, anytime now. It'd be nice. Just yeah, anytime. I second that. I'm glad we agree. Okay, we're gonna go. Anyways, go on. I see a plan. The next couple of days. I was I was like, I don't want to do anything. So we're gonna go, we're going to go make herbal tea out of stuff we find in the park. I do know the plants. It should be fun. It's all very, very cheap. So wait, what Park are you going? I mean, don't maybe don't say we don't want stock? I mean, this won't come out from Liberty Park by the duck on? How are you gonna find? Wait, is there a plan so you can make tea out of there? I would not eat anything by the daikon at Liberty Park. Yeah, I wouldn't leave. A lot of pine trees actually can make this really good sour tea from them. So you just boil the needles and you've got something so cool. Well, the day sounds away. Yes, yes. Okay, we're gonna go on to our next segment, which is I took a look at your profile. And I'm going to ask you some questions, but I'm going to also tell you why I think you chose certain answers or certain photos and then you can tell me really why you chose these things. Or if there's like a cool story or something. Let's go okay. I mean, you kind of already have set up nevermind, I'm gonna just say this and it will make sense. Okay, so right off the bat, you mentioned, you're in Costa Rica in a rain forest for 10 months. And I, I think that it's because you want to show that if there was an apocalypse, you're probably good at surviving in the wilderness. And what's your date suggests? It sounds like that is like, that's true. I would say yes. Also that, hopefully I can escape to the rain forest instead of being in the inversion. Yeah, me. Yeah. I shouldn't be doing that sooner rather than later. But if it was an apocalypse, would we still have an inversion? Depends, I guess what kind of apocalypse? You know, it'd be. Cheese? I sure hope not. Right. I mean, because what's the point? Yeah, I could understand, right? Like, if we're gonna get larger problem better replace some of our current problems? Yeah. Yeah. I agree. Do you think you would, sir. What do you think you would win that show? Naked and Afraid? Do you know, let the premise of that? Yeah. I mean, I've got the afraid park down. could you survive in the wilderness naked? Could you make your shelter? Think? I mean, I think with my vast unearned confidence, I would say yes, search for least three to five hours. Oh, days. I think they're out there for three weeks. It depends on you have another person's body usually, unless they tap out quick. Okay. I think I think I would do okay at that. Yeah, I'm probably not as skillful at things either think I am. I know how to find acorns. But if someone else got the acorns first, we're in trouble. Yep. So really, you didn't even choose that because it goes living in a Costa Rican rainforest. Sounds pretty cool. Yeah. Honestly, the rainforest sounds sexy. So like, I was like, oh, Costa Rica is so nice. And then then you have a conversation. And then I can tell them that I only saw a very small part of Costa Rica, because I was studying dung beetles. And that's cool. Yeah, that's so cool. It's fun. Um, I don't describe that in too much detail. But yeah. Did you live like in a tent? Or did you have like a place to live? I had, like, I lived in that like, actually was like, fairly nice. I lived in like, no, like a house. Exactly. But like, it was like a structure. Right? And so like, I want to say yeah, like, a lot of amenities. wash my clothes by hand, though. That sucks. Oh, yeah. Just doable. People do all over the world every day. I'd love to never do it again. Yeah. That is do people when they match with you, is that the first thing that they ask you? There's that and then people? I think you've probably seen my profile that I tell people that ice cream I've made and so Oh, yeah. Yeah. We'll talk about that. Don't ya don't? Okay, we'll get to that later. Well, we're, we're gonna talk about it now. Actually, let's just move forward. Yeah. So me speaking on behalf of all women everywhere, regardless of lactose intolerance level. Did you know that the key to every woman's heart is through ice cream flavors? I think being interesting, you know, I think I stumbled onto something with this. It's been almost horrifyingly effective in that a lot of people. resonated. It's good because a lot of people like this and do like you should make some weird like, okay, look, so, yes, Ben and Jerry's 31 flavors, whatever. Like, yeah, plenty of them are boring, right? It's like, yeah, really different flavor. If it's like chocolate and then chocolate with brownies in it. Like the chocolates worthy, right? Yeah, is worthy? like cookie dough is great. Right? But like, I just feel like I just feel like the ice cream mafia, if there is one presumably is really holding out on us. Right? Yeah. It's been really, really interesting to see what kinds of ideas people come up with, like, oh, you should make this you should make this a thing as people are super creative. And it's all kinds of great ideas. Right? The problem is done. I'm like, Okay, well now I have to make it I haven't honestly made ice cream in a long time so that I'm like full. Like, we should make this and I'm filled with guilt. And then I stopped responding and it backfires. So it's like it's too overwhelming. Sometimes you get too overwhelmed by the prospect of making creative. You have to go through is that very is that a little bit too intimate for first date, making ice? Interesting ice cream. Okay, so consider this right? So one of the better ice creams The Message asked me which I actually did make was you should make an avocado ice cream with cacao nibs. And so like kind of like me this like avocado can bass and like avocado on it sweet actually is like super creamy. So it's like yeah, it's incredibly creamy thing. And I put like some like chocolate bits in it also these cacao nibs. I did like a roll ice cream because I don't have an ice cream maker. So I'll usually use dry ice to freeze it or something. Yeah, anyways, though, so like, I made this really, really good ice cream. And I was like, I was like, Hey, I made it. But the problem is, then it's like, okay, well, I've never met this person before thing you're gonna say her name is Mackenzie, right? I'm like, okay, we can see. Like, I have this ice cream is the wintertime. And like, where do you meet? So with ice cream? I suggested McDonald's and she's like, Hey, it's a little neat. Yeah, we Mackenzie, the ice cream was so good. At least you got that out of it. Right? Yeah, so I feel. I feel like making ice creams gotta be like, to the point where you feel comfortable having them at your house. So it's like, too, a little bit too intimate for first date. Have you ever heard so I used to work at a gelato shop. Okay, you know, better? No, I don't. It's called the old Cetti's sound like night the night and they would have like, yeah, they would have a competition like every six months of who could invent the best flavors. And they had some good ones. There was like a basil. It was like balsamic phase. I don't remember but it was really like savory and sweet. It was delicious. So so we got them there. They're trying a little bit harder to make weirder. No, show Schelotto I do think it for as far as like, like, I mean, I guess gelato and ice cream are a little different. Right? But like as far as like ice cream type things go? Yeah, we're definitely they definitely make some really good ice cream is really interesting flavors. And other place though. Like that. i If anyone is in Bountiful. There's a place called blacks with ice cream. And the flavors aren't always wild, but they're like really just really good quality. And it's like yeah, it's like I feel like somewhere like is it dough Cetti's? Or don't say so to us or like blacks with ice cream like really part of it? Like, I mean, you can buy ice cream at the store. Right? So you kind of go Yeah, experience and then so I do think like places like that deliver. And I think kind of like what I figured out as I've tried to make more ice cream is that like honestly, like it's really easy to have an idea for it. But like, actually making good ice cream is a lot of work. And so yeah, I commend anyone who makes any ice cream for any reason. And like, like even down to like the party pails like we'd like to one gallon unpretentious, like, stabilized anyway. Okay, I could go on I guess that's I do like ice cream. So yeah. Yeah, and it seems to work for your for your dating profile, even if it becomes too overwhelming, but that's okay. Okay, so it's just, it's just my brain. One of your photos? Is you in front of a giant tree is this to subliminally message so that you're not afraid of the bigger picture you know, I could say yes. It also means I can be in wilderness is say that I have a casual audience with trees. Food. Yeah, I go away from them. I don't know. That's really stretching you just found you just found so rarely did you just find a cool tree and you're like, I want a picture next. That's exactly what happened. Yeah, I love big trees. Like it was a very cool tree. Trees are great. Yeah, but there's only so much you can say about a dating profile. Yeah, you can just take a picture of yourself in front of one and there you go. Okay, so you have a photo of you casually in a large body of water presumably in Costa Rica and you're kind of like so what was your like doing this so what action is this to show us that you're fearless? Are there crocodiles where they're scary animals for some reason I just imagine that's what was going on in that water and you're like yeah, I don't care. So we put these camera traps across this like beautiful like shallow clear river before the dirt like when was the dry season right? We had to go back to get them but by then it was like really muddy and in the water was high and like we had to wait for it to go down. So he crossed the river and then we'd like, but it was a lot longer the way we went. And then so then we found this like, basically like this disgusting ditch, right? And so I went into that, and it was like, You know what? So what? And it's like, just to regulate yourself to like the crappiness of everyday life, right. So yeah, I think there's something to just be like, it's like, it's like when you're like on a hike, and you're trying to not get your shoes wet, but like when you eventually just surrender to say, you know, so yeah, I'm one with the mud. That's like, so, c'est la vie. French people will say that I had this teacher, I was there for six weeks and six weeks, and she would always say, when something shitty would happen, she would just be like, c'est la vie. That's just, you know, that's life. Because we had, we were there during a heatwave. And then our teachers went on strike. So we didn't have like school for like a week. And she's like, that's just, yeah, they do that a lot. The French people love to go on strike, and I'm, like, good for them. It happened. When on the train, we were stranded somewhere because they all went on strike. It was a good time. But yeah, c'est la vie. That's like, just means like, shit happens, and that you just got to go along with it. So that's a much better. I feel like that's a much better interpretation of that photo than mine. But yeah, okay. Next question. I asked this to every person who has a photo from a wedding. Are you contractually obligated to have a photo of yourself at a formal event to to get on these apps? I feel like everybody's got one. It's true. And in this case, the wedding photo is a wedding I conducted. So you you married them? Yes. i And I'll do so again. So they chose you to officiate their wedding face, because it's correct. And then, which I thought was great, because they gave me basically carte blanche to say whatever I wanted, which is generally tasteful and sentimental, but I also definitely, in no uncertain words, advise them to build a CRO army. So that sounds a mate. I officiated my sister's wedding. And I thought I was gonna get way more jobs officiating because they all thought I did so great. But I am officiating with my friend's wedding in June because they met because of me, and I think that's, I think that's what I meant to do. It's gonna it's not really. It's surprisingly fun, though, right? Like, it is super fun. It's like you're kind of the center of attention, but not really. And so that's fine. Like, it's not really the you're not the center of attention, but you're like getting the attention. I don't know. It's like you've been entrusted with this fragile thing. Yeah. In that moment, you have like absurd total control you like so yeah. has led me into his wedding. Yeah, pools. Yeah. I did cry, though. On my sister's one. Like, while she was reading her vows because she was crying. It was just yeah, she I thought I had way more control than I actually did. But yeah, cool. We've Yeah, I assumed because you were in the middle of the like, archway that you did that. You got to share. Wedding Officiant is club now. Yeah. And I feel like it means that we're very charismatic and people like us. That's the moral of the story. And I think it's, yeah, I think that that's a great thing to put on a dating profile your character. Obviously, you'd have to be charismatic to do that. Unless the wedding was boring. Which happens. That was that was really fun wedding. Oh, man. Which I don't like. That seems like a thing. I don't feel like I ever say but like, yeah, it was like, that was like a good time. Yeah. They were weddings. Yeah. Yeah, weddings can be fun. Utah. Weddings generally aren't fun, though. My Oh, yeah. That one was that one was nice. Yeah, I think from Maryland, so there's that. But yeah. All right. Next question. You said that you'd think the world would be better with more sharks. What's your favorite shark and why? Oh, man. Okay, so I think we have to narrow down it's like a top three. I think the first one that comes to mind are thresher sharks, which like have a super long whip like tail. Yeah, like Stan Fischer there, right? That's pretty cool. Then you have like, Tiger sharks, which have cool stripes on them. And of course he is. And like, the garbage cans of the sea, right, though? Yeah. Take a bite out of everything. And I think there's a lot to respect with that. Oh, um they're not my favorite but Goblin Sharks you have to respect what there's what are their free gave them freaky on down there and like their jaw like shoots out and just like yeah. Yeah, I love Goblin Sharks they're they're freaky. My favorite. I really I'm going to be real and say I love whale sharks because I just want to see one in the wilderness I went to the so in Ireland if you go at the right time, they have a bunch of whale sharks and you can go like kayak with them. But we I went to Ireland at the wrong time and I was sad because I would want to, but I also really like Greenland sharks because they just have an interesting sad story because they all get those I parasites and they're all blind so they can't see and I'm like I wonder what like why haven't they just not like I don't know evolutionarily lost their eyes I guess seems annoying but they just to have eyes in general a few and the good so it's like they can they do they live like like more than 200 years so it's just like these poor blind or like always the blind like for so long. The experience comprehensible Yeah, I'm glad that you actually like sharks. Do you ever talk to sharks? about sharks with people on the on the app is anyone there was one that you that's one person you're talking about it but I got really pessimistic really fast. I was using shark like a proxy for like, it's conducting just for the world. And I was I was like, oh, yeah, but anyways, yeah, what about you? What do you kill the bed? Like? Yeah, I like the problem is like, I want to hate sharks. I just don't feel like it's like, Do you people I mean, there's a whole week of shark we should I guess they're not people. People are still eating sharks and like, what kind of society is this that we're like, we're eating sharks now. Like, I think it's because they're often caught as bycatch. And so they just saw them opportunistically. I don't think they can but like, but like they've been around longer than like trees. Apparently. They've been long. Like, dinosaur like, show a little fish a little respect. I agree. Honestly. Okay, so here's one. Here's a question for you. Okay. Yeah. Assuming that okay, you're killed by a freak accident? Yeah, only pain that happens instantaneously. Your two options are you're killed by a car crash or you're killed by a shark. Which was you choose and why? Okay, so it's instantly you don't like like, you don't anticipate it. It's the you don't like have like, the lingering fear of being stalked by a car or running into Shark on a freeway, you know, okay. i Well, I would obviously choose shark but because like, I would want people to talk about how I died by all except that people would maybe be afraid of shark let's say that nothing happens like sharks images on damaged. Okay, but now a shark obviously, because, I mean, part of life is dying. And it's cool via the cool story. Like, I'm staying. Right? Some people like like, if you scare him, like you don't feel anything, but like, but Sharks are scary. I'm like, But you rather die in a car crash? I mean, like, I just really like, knock on wood. But like, that'd be super lame. Like, Oh, yeah. Many of choose many other ways to go especially. Yeah. It would be I would hope that people would know that I got killed by a shark though. So they could like it wasn't me just going missing. They'll be like, she died by shark. I'm gonna be like, cool. And then I'd be like, now you must save all the sharks on planet or something like that would be my last wish. I think my sister would know, me and my sister, my sister and I love whales. And which also, I love sharks too. But whales. I don't know. They're easier to emotionally connect with because they're really very emotional animals. And I feel like she would know that I would be like, we got to save the sharks. Even if I got eaten by one. Like I get it. We'll do that for you. Crusade positive. Yeah. Yes. Okay. This is our last question for your profile. Okay, you say you're that falling asleep instantly would be the superpower of your choice. Is this because you want women to know you're not one of those kinds of dudes who will fall asleep? Mid conversation I feel like once men hit a certain age, they can fall asleep. No matter what. It's wild, regardless of why, right? It's like, yeah, I feel like it's like, that's when you're like crossing into like, the dad realm is like, yes. He's like, just like in the middle of this conversation like you just you'd like pausing at some point I can just I will be fine. Yeah. I ended the home video I have. I have three siblings, and we're all like, under the age of, like 14 In this video, and we're just going insane, like dancing and screaming and attacking each other. And then you pay like my mom pans over my dad's asleep on the couch. And it's like, I don't he must be. No, you just develop that. At some. So basically, you're saying you you aren't that though? No, it's hard to sleep for me. So yeah. And then also the like, it's like, I mean, sleep is the closest thing we have to time travel. Right. So it's like, yeah, I would like to like, take this cat for example. She's, like, cat seriously. So on top of things, yeah. Like abilities, including sleeping 18 hours a day. Yeah. I respect this. So you can't sleep like you're not a person who just can't sleep at night. You can't take naps? I can't what you're saying I can take I'm actually okay, taking naps. But I think if I like you know, like the controlled narcolepsy. Yeah. All right. You're like, Okay, I've got 15 minutes before my interview. I'm going to sleep for 13. And then just Yeah, fall asleep. Wake up, refreshed. Ready to go? Yeah, that will be nice. Yeah. I hear that. I think it was Navy SEALs. They like train themselves to fall asleep in four minutes. For for I don't know what reasons but I don't know if I mean, if they should give this secret out to all of us. I feel like all of us could use this ability. Like if Yeah, they're holding on us. That's not Yeah, rude. I love sleeping. That's just part I don't fall asleep easily, because I think a lot and I get like ideas for creative things when I'm trying to fall asleep. But I can sleep for a long time. I love sleep. It's great. To be ready. Okay, we're gonna do? Um, let's do Would You Rather, I have found some that I think seem difficult that maybe they're easy for some people. Okay, would you rather live the same day for a year, like Groundhog's Day continuously for one year? Or take three years off the end of your life? would obviously live the same day? Wait, hold on, what am I doing the end of my life? Do I know it's the end of my life? I don't think so. I think it's like, like you don't know. Yeah. You know, actually, I think I wonder if I get to pick the day because there's some days where like, it would be great to be great to relive it right. But for 365 days, you think you wouldn't get sick. Okay, let's imagine if you can, like build a skill because like that was one thing I got from Groundhog Day, right? It's like yeah, suddenly become ridiculous to get a lot of things because you have a lot of time, right? It's like, yeah, you press that in. Then again, though, if I were like, I think there's a lot of people who like I used to want to be old Super overnight when I died. When I when I was a child I wanted to live as long as possible. Yeah, no, like, I don't actually think like, human lifespans have gotten longer, but like our quality of life is not necessarily better. Yeah, I mean, consider this right? We can now stream almost anything but now we have to pay for five or eight streaming services that doesn't see the quality of life to me. They might have been talking about health or something, but I would say if I'm if I'm to be in poor health anyways, I would settle for just like, one, you know, just back when it used to just be Netflix. It was just better that way. You have to go back. Yep. I think I mean, it depends on how old you live to but I would just assuming that you live following my my, both my grandparents died when they were they were pretty old. And I'm like, it would like it. I don't think it would have affected any of their lives if they died three years earlier. Like I think they probably Yeah, like, I think my, my grandma died when she was 93. And she was like, Cool. I'm ready. Like, and she had been ready for like five years. She was like, I'm done. Let's, let's get this show on the road. So it's like, wouldn't be that. Much like thinking about it now, obviously, we're still youthful. So it's, but I don't know. I mean, honestly, right. It's like, if I'm like, if instead of living to 83 I only live to 80. That seems okay to me. Like, yeah. Because like, what am I going to be doing really? Right. Just like being cantankerous? Yeah. I don't know. I so I think I would rather, I'd rather probably take three years off. That sounds weird to say, but yeah, you know what, I think I agree with this. Okay. So here's another one. Okay. Okay, what would you rather be able to dodge anything? No matter how fast it is? So like, I guess, like, sort of like the flash, he can, you know, get away from stuff or ask any three questions and have them answered accurately. I would probably go with dodging things, because then you can just like, given the ability to learn it know, anything, I probably just asked like, a stupid question. So like, just something like, that'd be like consumed by regret for like, having asked like, why it is the penguins can't fly or something. It was like an easily Google answer. Yeah. Or is this saying that, that you are always getting hit? stuff? Is that what you're telling us? I think there's a lot of times that if I could just get out of something, just slip out the bag. Yeah, it was from like, documenting objects. Okay. Just like some sudden financial obligation, I'd be super useful. That would be I didn't think about like that. But that that meant you guys, you can take it that way. I like. Yeah. And then also, like, I guess, like, I mean, there's probably more like, if people were like shooting at you, or if people were throwing, like, for example, like a running chicken that you to pick a non specific example. That hasn't happened. That would be real bad. Yeah. Real bad. And it's an endless supply of dodging. So you can do Yeah, yeah. Okay. Questions, like, no way too much press, too much pressure to pick the perfect third, you'd spend your life thinking about what you should be asking. And then I would die three years before I had the idea. Yeah, you late. Okay, last question. Would you rather be forced to sing along or dance to every song you hear? Oh, man, well forced to, like your, your body has no choice but to sing or dance. Definitely Dancing. It'd be pretty disruptive. But like, Yeah, I mean, because like, what happens if, like, so help me Nickelback comes on the radio, right? Like you hate it, but you're like compelled. Then again, dancing to Nickelback is also not like, how do you for that you would find you would find a way your body would find a way to do it. Really, you just got to avoid bad music. That's what you would have to try to do. But like if you went to a grocery store, they're always playing music could be Nickelback. I haven't paid that much attention. But you'd have no choice. Horrifying, but you'd be really good at dancing. Yeah, you'd be good. And people would probably admire you. Let's get real. A lot of I've never I've never seen somebody like groovin in public where I was like, Get a life. I was like they haven't. They're having a life that we should all be having. That's what I think. Rather than someone seeing in public. I also say, Well, nice. I do not want to pick myself. Yeah, that's how Yeah, singing. I don't know if they're, if they're good, and they're trying to show off. Get out of here. Y'all. We all know like at least three theater kids who are like this, right? Oh, yeah, yes, yeah. 100%. Okay, we're gonna move on to our next segment. Okay. Do you have any bad dating, like a bad date story, and doesn't have to necessarily be from the app, but I've just noticed that that tends to be where bad dates are born. I mean, there definitely been days where they can like they ended the day pretty fast and left for like, unknown. Oh man that was, I mean, this isn't like the best worst day it's even. It's pretty like, we just got it like I just didn't know what to talk to this person about. So she's asking too many questions about like, I don't know her like life and upbringing and stuff. And she's like, Yeah, well, then we got Indian food, and it was too spicy for her to eat it. She picked this spiciness. I will note, yeah, that's normal. It was pretty spicy. But it was too spicy for her food. I asked her for food that she gave it to me, which is nice. Right? Then we went to pay. And like I had asked her on this date, so I was fine paying for it. And I didn't have my wallet, which is just awkward. And so if you paid for it, and I remember her after, but just it was there was no second. Yeah, yeah. Better than that, though. Man, I'm terrible at dates and dating anything like just once I'm emotionally invested in it, it's over. But like it was this one time where, like, I suppose I should have known things were going wrong when I was like, in the trunk of my own car, looking for keys. But instead, I was like picking my hands on a cactus that I had purchased in there. And like, it's a whole thing, right? But like, was it dark? Or were you just like, frantic? So you're like, Ah, I've been your hands were just magnetized to like, so I wanted to make this as tech work club, right? Yeah, just as one does, and have any skills for this. Right. But someone had seen a club at the DI was actually a Fijian work club, you know, okay, okay. I was like, okay, person who I met in a figure drawing class as I went off there, and I got this pretty awesome, more club thing. And I was just swinging around like, a university parking lot, right. And I was like, I better put this away. And so I threw it into the trunk of my car. Oh, I also stopped a rancher markets. I love ranch markets. You can buy cactus there, right? You know, just to get it? Yeah. So then I, I threw that in to like, I threw the club into like, just tucked into my trunk along with my bag, and along with my keys, and then it. I locked it in there. But I was near the university police station. And I was like, You know what? I just need to just own up to this one. I know they can open this for me. So they did. And so I was like, in there though. And then I remembered a horrible, horrible fact that I should have thought about before I asked the police for help. And so as I successfully crawled out of my trunk and got out the police is like, okay, and I heard them like calling on the radios to always check to see if you have anything. Yeah. And they'd run my license. And they're like, did you know that your license has been expired? And like, maybe like for a year and a half? Oh, I was like, I know who? And oh, by the way, but at this time, I'm on my way to date, right. So like, I'm sorry, I shouldn't be at this person's house. But I'm yeah, I'm instead being confronted with my own like, in a note. And so I'm like, Oh, I never had time to renew the license. He's like, for a year and a half. I'm like, No, you just, I think he just had have had a day. So he wasn't really willing to push it much. He's like he said, Look. I'm not like, I'm just gonna tell you that it's not legal to drive a car without a license. I'm gonna go now do whatever you want to do. But just know that that's, that's just kind of like, the law is and I suggest you renew your license. And I was like, okay, cool. And so suddenly, at this moment in my life, I decided to suddenly start obeying the law, which I've been earning for a year and seven months. So I'm like, I can't use I have been in my car parking lot and I call my roommate like roommate, he just chaperone me I meant chauffeur me and I did that. So he goes up and it's like super old like for tourists stationwagon thing and we can pick this this girl up that I'd met and poor poor person, right? So if like, she was just fine, right? She's just a normal person just like wept into like, this stupidity. And so I go over, and I pick her up and and then I take over to him. I've known him for a bit so I bring it back to the apartment where we're making of course tacos, which I purchased. And so it's like, so like by now like, I've been in my car I left the cactus now I got the cactus out. I have the cactus. I have these chili peppers. This is getting real long. Okay. There we are. We're making tacos. Yes, like chipotle peppers. Super, super spicy. So I'm like painstakingly like removing each of the seeds and the ribs and all this stuff. Like, why are we doing this? I'm like, because it'd be too spicy. If we have this in and so then with that, I, my brain like the wires crossed, and I throw away, like, peppers into it. And I jumped all the seeds into the top because we're cooking. It's instantly red. Like it's rendered like impossibly spicy. It's like just over because they're like, they're like, it's like, yeah, I put I've put in the equivalent of like, 15 Jalapeno seeds just in this right and I am a weak white person, and yes, suffer. And so also, I decided to make tortillas by hand, but she was she'd had hip surgery. So she was on crutches. Yeah, she couldn't do this. So we're gonna sit down and like, and so eventually the like, um, oh, yeah. When we got to the apartment, I didn't have the key because I lost it. Months before, but someone else had it. Fortunately. So I mean, usually it's going into the winter, but someone locked the window. I don't know why. Okay, well, you usually got him through the window. Like, it's like I didn't lose the key was just somewhere buried in my room. Like the detritus of eras. Yeah. So like, but we got and so then then we had like the the, like, the very badly made tacos. Yeah. And, like, I make some awesome food sometimes. But that was not one of those days. And so like, I decided that I'm going to just like, drop her off at her house. Like, no, we're not going to try anything crazy. Just just, you know, just just kind of call it good, right? Yeah. And so my roommate had had the keys to open up the car open up the, the, the house and so he's like, Okay, well, I'll give you guys a ride back then. Do you have my keys, I'm like your keys. He's like the keys I gave him like which keys you like the keys that have the apartment key and my car keys. And I had lost them somewhere in the apartment. And so he's trying to unlock his car. And this girl is there and I'm like, I'm gonna get real rent. Like there's out in like this dark parking lot. And like, they're fine, right? But like, I I'm like, Okay, I'm going to look for the keys inside. And so then I go inside and like, you know, like, what, like, when you like walk into a room and like you forget why you were there. Yeah, I walked into my house and I forgot anything about what just happened in like the past, like, two hours. And so I got there, like, went to the bathroom, like sat down a bit. Just kind of like, just chill on my couch. And my room is like So how was your day? I was like, what days like the date? I was like, Oh, the day I'm on a date right now. And so then i i run and I find the keys which I just put in the bathroom or something. I go outside. He's like Jimmy open his car. He's gone. Like, I don't tell her that I've forgotten everything. Yeah. And then then I help her eventually limp to your front door where I give her a super awkward hug and then I leave and within a week she moved to Mexico because of that, but like we can't just kept it. Yeah, sounds like you had like a roller coaster for you. I mean, maybe that's what I'm gonna say I've had I've had a date where somebody said that they forgot their wallet. And then after I paid for our movie, he got out of his wallet and was showing me all the cash that he had. And I was like maybe he maybe I should have given him a chance maybe forgot that he had his wallet or something. It was impossible. Yeah, I don't Yeah, I wouldn't I mean maybe yeah, maybe all just like the bad dates are like just just us you know bad circumstances adding up then again that's just you can't manage like the own chaos of like doing a daily task like renewing a license. Like like just cascades and like a number of amusing but entirely avoidable situations. Like Anna she was like really good humoured about it right but like like a champ just like but like Oh, how embarrassing right? Well, yeah, these these things happen. It's fine. She, I mean, she was gonna move so it would have been bad if it went well. Right. Yeah, I'll go with that. I'll go yes. Okay, we're on tour. Well our second to last segment. Do you have any like red flags when it comes to profiles like anything that you're like, can't do this. I think the question under the definitely are but I'm still If you like which ones you'd like, strategic to disclose in the podcast think hmm I hate to say I don't love dogs. I don't hate dogs. But I think yeah, some people, it's like, dogs. for them. It's the most important thing. So they're like, they're like, I will always love my pup more than you. And I say, Okay, well, just that solves that question. We're done here. Yeah, dog people are very, like people. Yeah. They're like their children. It's a little it's like, dogs just need a lot of care. So, yeah. And like, I have no issue with like treating dogs while right and like, yeah, taking care of them, respecting them, stuff like that. But then it's like, I think there's like, there can be it. Like, it's a case by case basis. Right. Usually, based on how attractive the person I think they are. But so there are cases they're like, that's fair. Sometimes. Right? I'm like, okay, overlooks several red flags. Oh, yeah. How could they know? I'm mad? Um, that damn dog. I was a German Shepherd. No, but like, I don't know, I think I think it's just kind of like, for me, it's just it's just a knock. labeled me and with like, the general like guys who are afraid of commitment thing, right. But it's like, it's like a whole lot. It's a it's a lifestyle choice. And I think it's like, I respect that. But like, I think I just kind of like dogs. So if someone really really really likes dogs, that's tricky. Yeah, you're gonna want to go to dog parks all the time. Right? Or, like, if you're paying for your dog's massages, like Shin beds. We certainly do and a house like this. Yeah. Throw in dog parties. You know, that's no, that's a lot. That's a lot of water. Yeah, cats. I feel like cats are chill. Cats are just kind of like autonomous doing things and like, yeah, right. Cool. Good job, cats. Yeah, birds, birds. I am sorry for anyone who has a bird. I had a bird. I'm so sorry. They're funny, but like I'm so sorry. That bird people are very serious about birds. I feel like birds are a red flag for me personally. It bird people are wild. They are are obsessed. Also they're like a dog or a cat. They lived hops 20 years apparently I live over at like, yes, it is our lifetime commitment. Like more than your life. Like this parrot won't last empire. Yeah. Yeah, he will bite us all. Yep. Any other red flags? They can be specific to you. I don't think I think for me when people like I don't like conspicuous consumption much like for me, it's not good. If someone like if someone's like, I see profiles for the like, the like, only take me to like a fancy restaurant or like, I'm yeah, I'm like, I'm a high roller and I like nice thing. And like, it's okay. Like nice things. It's okay to pamper yourself. But like, if this is someone's like de facto way of going, like, like, I'm just not that person I just would rather like, like, it's not going to be compatible. No, somebody is trying to. They just need you to take them to steak dinners every No, unless, and I guess honestly, I still don't think these aren't the people I match with. Yeah. Right. Like I don't know. Like, I dumpster dive. I forage I sleep in on inadvisable places. I don't know like that's just it's just not gonna work out. It's not gonna work. Yeah, right. Like, yeah. And does that make sense? Yeah, I mean, I do really I do. Some people have awesome style way better than me. But then it's just like, if you have like, if you can't, I don't know. It's like, Who wants to go to like a fancy resort every country? Why not just like, do whatever and see what happens. But yeah, I could talk about that. Okay, so that's one Sure. Yep. Yep. Very I felt like that's just high maintenance people and people do people really like are there women that are like I? I only like fancy dinners. Like they say that? Yeah, there's not a couple of weeks one person never match that this shows that I still swiped them despite all my scribbles. But like, she's taking it. Like it's like the thing is like I feel like, like do Getting abs, it's like, it's kind of like a weird bus station and that like, you'll never see any of these people again, but like over time, like, Oh, hey, it's you again. And like, see like your current sort of cross paths. So you see people's profiles change over time. You're like, okay, yeah. Like, there's at least one person. Like, she dropped the part about, like, the fancy dinners, right. But like, like, she's like, conventionally attractive, a successful business person Brazilian. And, which doesn't mean anything, but she is. And then so she's, she's like, I only like to go to like, just a little nearby like restaurants, right? But like, fancy Fancy Pants places, right? Like this. Why would you like, like, I think, I'm guessing that they're, that people have done that for them. They so they automatically they're like it. That's what I like, I think a lot of things that women put on their profile. It's because men do that. Men will take them to fancy dinners on the first day and spend like, whatever, however much people spend on fancy dinners. But I think it's because I think it's because people do it. And they're like, I'm gonna keep on doing I'm gonna get a Yeah, it's wild wild out there. Again, maybe if we all made wildly more money, I'd be like, sure, whatever. But like, Yeah. How's it is? Yeah, I don't know. I get that. So you talk, you talk to a lot of people in the US, right. So like, I know, like, like, what are some things that you like? What are what are some red flags? You see people like come up with or like what I guess I just mean, right? The the Well, I feel like the ones that many people have stated is having their Instagram in their in their profile, because it's just like, a way for them to gain followers for my followers. Yeah, yeah. And it's just like, Yeah, that's a big one. And then hiding that they have children. That's a big one too. People hate it. Like is say, like, Okay, I don't know, people, people will be like, you can just tell they have kids because like, I'll take a car selfie, and you see a car seat, which isn't always fair, because I take care of a baby. I don't take car sell selfies, but I do have a car seat in my car. And I do not have a child. But yeah, that I think those were the are the biggest ones like the people who are just there to get followers and then hiding kids. I think that's the only ones that I've heard from you guys also Insta farm. Do they all do guys also, there are. So I think it's a very much if you're under the age, because my mine is like to low eight, I think my lowest was 21. Because it even though none of them want to be on a podcast that I've learned. And men if none of these young dudes and then like toe to 50 or something. They also don't want older people. It's all like people that are in my age range that would are into being on the podcast, but it's all young people who have like Instagram and Snapchat on there's and then there's like, you know, Jim bros will who will always have their Instagram handles but yeah, I feel like that's, I feel like for me, that's also a red flag. And they have said, like, if just if it's just there is to handle Oh, yeah, yeah. Or it's like, if it includes it. Is that okay? For you? I think it's okay. Because there's people who like have into like, if they're like a photographer, like they have a really interesting like, if they're, it's connected and it's like an interesting, obviously, there are two sticks now just them at the gym. I mean, yeah, it depends on the person. Right? Because there's sorry, cut you off. No, no, here you go. Certainly. It's like just a handle or like no bio. It's like, yeah, like you think of it. You think you're so much better than us. But here we are alive. So like, yes, that's that's, that's definitely there are people who will have just one picture there. And it's always Snapchat. I don't understand Snapchat. I'm jewel for Snapchat. I'm too old for that shit. So yeah, that's a weird that's a thing that the youngins use. and I are like when people say like, I matched with people, and I'm very obvious that I want podcast people and they'll be like, Oh, um, I actually don't get on this app. So can I have your phone number? And I'm like these little scheming boys and I always just ignored them. Not just Yeah, but I Oh yeah. What about oh, yeah, one one other red flags. Yes. Heavily filtered like, oh, yeah, I don't understand why people filter but like if someone was puts like, Oh man 2016 When like the dog tone filter was Oh, yeah. Like we've moved everybody society somehow, like, a lot of things have happened the world but that's one thing we've got going for us. Yeah. Like I don't I don't know. I don't know I think it's I think that people who use filters I think it's kind of like a sign of a little bit of insecurity which, depending on how I feel like if you're so scared, you can't show your face. That's like, a little bit I would assume. I don't ever I don't know if men use them. I don't think I mean, they do. Some of them do. So it's like, thing is like, it'd be one thing if the filter made them look better in some way. Yeah, it looks doesn't it? Like face texture? Where's like, when you have pores, what is this? Yeah, like? I think that kind of goes along with the the Instagram I think. I think that's a lot of people's red flags if they like don't feel comfortable, like showing their, their real self. That's a red flag. I don't know. I know. Everyone's trying to show their best side but me personally, if I was using it for dates, I would try to find like, pictures that look most like me. I don't know. Yeah, it's just me because you don't want to show up and then been like, Ah, fuck, she's, like so much different. I don't know. That's just me. I like we all roll out of bed. Looking at ourselves, right? Like, yeah, no, just at some point. It's like, I don't know. I get I get how that's a rare I get that's a red flag and I feel like it's it's more common on Tinder than Bumble. Oh, yeah, I haven't. I haven't gone to Tinder yet. That's kind of a Realm i have to build up to because I'm afraid. But eventually I'll get there. Just gotta feel that. Yeah. i It's hard. I mean, yeah, it's we'll see. We'll see. I'll get there eventually. Have any green flags? Anything that's like, yes, immediately. Um, I think it's cool. I there's a lot of really adventurous like, people out there a lot of really cool, like, very talented. Like, I've liked the idea of rock climbing. I'm not really a climber. Like I've been to jail a couple of times, but I'm like, really impressive. People are like good at stuff. I'm like, Oh, wow, this person canyoneers This person client, like, I guess it's a huge OSU is like a high proportion of this. Yeah. I think that's really cool. And so I'm like, Oh, awesome. Like, I think if someone seems like, like, I like it when people have things like their like that they care about. Right. Like, nothing obscure, but like, if they're into it. I think that's really cool. I think it's I think it's if people if people say they like ice cream, I'm like, Okay, well, this is where? Yeah. That's in their bio. Yeah, that is gonna work. Like my idea of a perfect date is is like, perfect. Well, perfect. But like the idea of this is perfect. Yeah. Um, I think so. I think it's like I think being outdoorsy is cool. Um, I think if I like it if people seem adventurous, and like, honestly, I'm not particularly outdoorsy or adventurous, like, because there's always there's someone who's extremely good at everything. And I feel like I'm okay at a couple of things. But, so it's cool to see what people are up to out there. Um, what's something else for somebody like green flags? They think I like it if people are like, very short, like I'm a spy on a variety of heights, right? Like I'm vaguely tall. And so like I think it's nicer someone is taller. I think that's okay. I was gonna say you like really short girls. What? Oh, okay. Sorry, shorter people. You're fine. And I yeah, I feel like a big high difference just seems like a literal pain in the neck. Right. And like already, you already need to see iron people and a lot of being Yeah. So I think I think that's like fairly superficial, but that's nice. I think people speak more than one language is nice. I think for me, I think a general indication that people want to like traveling. Something we'd all like to do more super expensive doesn't always work out. Like it's not like not having that as an issue, right? Because like I think I feel like I personally have lucked out and things I've been able to do or like, yeah. Or perhaps my general. Okay, hold on. If someone is interested in exploring their surroundings, whether that's your close by or internationally, I think that's super cool to learn from these people, because very much about almost anything. So yeah. Those are great. Those are great green flags. Makes sense. Are you ready for our last question and then hanging up on you? Hey, are you in love with me now? It happens to you every person on this podcast, right? Everyone knows I'm sure. I have to say yes, Marta. Yes. I love ice cream, but I'm lactose intolerant. Well, there you have it. That's my conversation with internet stranger, Neil. I don't know how he feels about it. I don't think that he likes. I asked people if they love me at the end of the podcast, but I don't know because we have not spoken. I have not heard from Neil. Since we recorded this podcast. Shout out to you, Neil. I think we made a great episode together. I hope you're doing okay. Maybe you should email me. I don't know if you only if you feel like it. Anyways, you can follow us on our social media Instagram at Pursuit of Happiness podcast on tick tock and pursuit of happiness. And on Twitter, which I never look at. So maybe don't. But you can if you feel like at VOA underscore, pod. And you know, I'll see you next week. My lovely little babies