Internet Stranger Garrett #1

We talk to Garrett, the science guy (as I like to call him), where we talk about how weird religion is and also how I have weird priorities when it comes to the zombie apocalypse. Sound supervisor, our hero B.T. Measles. 
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Transcript

Unknown: 0:07

Hello, and welcome to the pursuit of happiness podcast. I'm your host Marta and this week we talk to internet stranger Garrett, where we discuss things like charging your crystals under a full moon and also being an unassuming bird. So open your ears and take a listen y'all Okay, are you ready? We're gonna jump right in there. Okay. icebreaker time. Okay, have you ever sent a dick pic? This is important. We need to know. No, I haven't I like am baffled by people who do this. Like what I don't understand. Like, what? Why, what is the rationale? Like, do people like ever actually respond positively to this? Like, I don't know. However, I think that really, it's like, the only time that it's appropriate is if like the woman or whoever asks for it. If they're like, I want to see it. Please. If you mean, yeah, like conceptual sexting? I personally, that's not something that I like. But, but I feel like it's a drunk thing. I don't think anybody does. Over but I don't know. No dicks for you. Good. Okay, so now, I'm going to ask you some questions, because I don't you're stranger to me. So I feel like these will help me kind of understand what kind of person you are. Okay, so what is your favorite movie? If you don't have one? You can tell me the last movie you watched and if you liked it, okay, I think I don't watch a ton of movies. So I Yeah, it's not that gray, that much of an informed favorite movie, but I think pericyte is my favorite movie so far. Like, I think I've seen it like three or four times in the past four years. And like, that's a lot of watching the same movie for me. And it's so good. It is so good. I had a friend before it was like released here. He tried to send me an illegal copy of it, but I was too dumb to figure out how to watch it. That was a one time. That's a one time I almost illegally watched a movie. I'm a very full believer in paying money for movies. Ah, I I just know. I mean, I write screenplays. So I know how much work that goes into it. And I mean, maybe I would not care that much. If it was like a Marvel movie. They'd make a shitload of money, but I just don't I'm not interested in watching that movie. It's just like kind of mean to steal. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Okay, so next question. Favorite musician or your number one Spotify artist or? I currently I have been, like, just sucked into this black hole of continuously listening to Tyler Childers. Tyler Childers. Tyler? Yeah, old Tyler. He's, he's a he's a sad boy who like secrets about like, what it's like working in the coal mine and growing up in like, rural West Virginia and like the only things that you do or like, snort coke, like drink a lot to cope with your problems. This sounds a lot like my favorite boy Ray LaMontagne. Yeah, yeah, like that's another that's very interesting. Like I've been like kind of down a little bit sick of Tyler's I've been listening too much. And I And Ray for a little while. So yeah, similar by Ray. Ray's my fave. I'll check this guy out. Okay. sadboy. You know, cocaine. That's, I don't do cocaine. But I like musicians who sing about it. Yeah. So I get it. Okay, cool. Next question. What is your job? All right, explain it in the most, you know, entertaining way. You can. Oh my god. I don't know if I can explain in an entertaining way. I'm a scientist or just say or just say yeah, what kind of scientists? So I am a psychologist and I do research for an online mental health company. Yeah, we had I've had one other scientists and he said that. It's like, what people want to talk about on the first day and he's like it gets it's like, way more boring than it sounds. rounds? And do you feel similarly? Or do you like talking about it? Um, yeah, I don't think I really liked I don't think I've ever really liked talking about my job because it's just like, yeah. dry enough as it is. And it's not really if somebody like takes an interest in it, like, I'm happy to talk about it. But yeah, I feel like most the time we talking about my job this is boring for the other person too. So I'm just kind of alive like other scientists on her like skirt skirt around it. And like, Yeah, our brains don't. Our normal brains as normies probably don't get it. I sense a accent on you an accent? There's probably just No, you said on it. Where are you from? So I grew up in Michigan. So I spent most of my life in the Midwest, so it's probably some sort of like, yeah, must my mom flare? My mom is from like, Wisconsin. So I like pick up on it very. Yeah, wasted. What tipped me off, so I can like, correct it. Um, I was just the way you say on but I'm also very, like, I just catch up. I think that language is very interesting. And accents and all that. So I like, I don't know, I just, I guess I have a good year for I can tell you not from here. That's basically people sometimes say that. I don't sound like I'm from here, because I pronounced my T's. Oh, because my name has my name is Marta. And, and people. I guess. Tell me obviously, my teas? I don't know, you know? I mean, do you tell them your name is Maura, I don't understand. No, I say I introduce myself as Marta. But people automatically here and like a lot of the country just say Marda with a D. Oh, so and we do that. Like we don't Utahns don't say mountain they say mount in and button like I just automatically do it maybe because I don't know why I do interested in as I just moved. I haven't talked to a lot of people like true Utahns while I've been here and I haven't like picked up on any sort of like local accent. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, we mostly like sound like your average, non Southern and non. Eastern, I guess those are where the big accents are. Yeah. Yeah, you'll catch on eventually. Okay. Next question. And you can interpret this in any way you want. What is wrong with you? Okay, so I'm gonna interpret this because this is a dating podcast. I'll interpret it in a in a date. Most people do tend to lean towards the dating. Yes. I wouldn't say what is wrong with me. And I think my friends would also agree with me that I like people who are mean to me. I like I like a bit of a masochist. If you ask my friends. So like it? Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I wish like this. When you're dating somebody. Yeah, they're just, yeah, I can't imagine that. A nice thing, but you know what? That works for you. Hopefully you find somebody who's like, teat teasing you and not really mean spirited. You know, I think that's the goal, like whether or not I'd get there someday is probably gonna be the product of therapy. Like not sure. Okay, that makes sense. So good. Okay, we're gonna move on to our next now that we know you. Yeah. And we know how your brain sort of works. I'm gonna ask you some questions. And these are questions for men over generalized questions, which means the year answering on behalf of all men of the world, oh my god, which might seem like a lot of pressure, but you know what, just take your best guess. That's what I've been telling people. Yeah, I feel like most of this has kind of the same answers. I gotta think of some different questions. Yeah, okay. Oh, this one is? Doesn't as well. Kind of, okay. Bigger trucks. Smaller dick. Is this true? I would love to believe it's true that yeah, like I just I don't know, it would feel like so. You've been vindictive is the right word, but like there's like an actual sense of justice in the world if that's true. That like, dude, yeah, like overcompensating with their fucking diesel. Big trucks in there. Yep. Micro dicks. So I believe it's true. But Yeah, I haven't either. I've never, I don't think I've ever been inside, like, talks, like been driven in a giant truck. Like there's a difference because in Utah, I feel like there's like the big truck dudes that are just like spinning to get in front of you on the highway. And then there's like the outdoorsy people, and it's like, pens what they're doing, I've driven my, I was a camper a lot. When I was younger, my, my family did that. And so you have to have like, a certain kind of tired of fit in certain places in southern Utah. So you tell us a little bit could be tricky, because there are just like, hopefully regular dudes out there, but I think I would. Okay, so like, I like all my family. They're all farmers. And I think if your truck is justified by its use, then like, this doesn't apply to you. But if it's unjustified, this is 100%. Yeah, you're compensating for your tiny penis. Yes, yep. Okay, we agree on this good answer. Okay, this one. It's just why sports. You didn't say like, why do they exist? Or why? Why why men like that. Lots of men like them. It like, I think it gives us something to like bond and connect over without having to like, talk about like feelings and like fill in like, dead air and silence. Like, it's a lot easier to like, talk about, I watch soccer. So it's all you sort of talk about, like some dude kicking a ball around and like, how terrible your relationship is? Or like, what's going on? And like, yeah, avoidance. It's a lot of avoidance, I think. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that makes sense. I think that soccer is actually when I was in France for like, a month of 2014. And they play soccer on TV is way more than any other sport. And I kind of understand it from sitting and like waiting for food and not understanding anyone. I was like, You know what I could? This is a great distraction while I'm waiting for my food. So I get soccer. And I feel like, Man, those guys, they have to run a lot. So much. So much running. Yeah, breezy. Um, okay, good answer. Last question of our overgeneralize questions for man. Why do you think there are so many songs about little black dresses? Are there the last person I asked to have said that too. It's either black or red. And maybe, you know, I think that others Okay, I can't think of a song about I think there's a famous country song about like a little black. Maybe it's only I feel like okay, so maybe it's movies. Maybe it's not even songs. I can't think of one either, but, but it's like a thing though, right? Like, it's like saying, Yeah, is that I wonder if it's like a women thing, because I can think of so many songs by female artists that talks about wearing a red dress and black dress, and maybe it's just like, we've made it up that men like black dresses. I don't know there's like it doesn't they say like, this, like a TV thing that like black makes you like look like smaller or something like that. And so like maybe that's like kind of driving like, oh, we really like black dresses. i Yeah, yeah, I really don't know. I don't know. Like it's kind of like a dark and dangerous color to like, red is like promiscuous. So like it all like feeds into this. Yeah, I don't know. Maybe it's like a sexy thing to wear? Yeah. Do you think that every woman should have a little black dress in there? I can. I don't know, I really don't care honestly. Like, I whatever. I'm thinking that men don't actually really notice. Like, what color your dress is, as long as you look. I mean, I think that I don't think men really care that much. And I'm just making this assumption. Yeah, I can think of one song I can think of one song. But it's very, nobody knows who the band is. So what? What's this? I mean, what if I don't know what if I know it? What is this? It's called faithless by the band flight. Yeah, you're right. Yeah. Fair British banded knee and they're quite small. I saw them at Urban lounge and they were an eye opener. So that's like They're very small, but I love them so small I just Yeah, well, okay are our dresses like aren't they're supposed to be like the most versatile dresses. That's what I feel like if you had a little black dress it usually I mean, it's not depends on style, but they're very classic. So it's like you have one in your closet and you can have it for like 10 years, and I won't go out of style. I don't I mean, I feel like I need to get one just because just to say that I have one in my closet. I don't have very many occasions to wear them. I was just kind of thinking about like, I don't know, like weddings, like the dress is almost as common as like a dude dressing up in a shirt and tie and a lot of Yeah, what Yeah, uses it. Really? Maybe it's, I mean, I think that in the movies and TV shows it's like they go to I mean, I can't imagine going to a bar in Salt Lake City and wearing like a sexy black dress. It just seems to dress out but maybe in like New York or LA. Yeah. But who knows? It's a mystery to me, too. i That's why it's that's why you're asking your own general interest. should I dress? Please tell me guidance? No, I don't think I I'm just not that type. Maybe for weddings. My friends are getting the age of getting married, y'all. So I guess I need a feeling. Yeah, you're 29? Yeah, according to Bumble, Allegedly. Allegedly. Yeah, who knows? I like I don't know if I've ever since I turned 25. I've always been a little confused about my age. And so like, I'm like, it's either 28 or 29. And it's like all this. It doesn't really matter at this point. My my. I was born in 1990. So I just add 10 years to the last part of the year. Oh, that's handy. So like, yeah. But most of the year, I'm not that I'm minus one because I was born in October. So it doesn't really pan. I don't know. slightly easier to remember. Take your 30s are for forgetting how old you are. But I haven't yet because it's all been in COVID. And I'm like, Oh man, my 30th birthday could have been fun. And as fun as it should have been. It's probably just better to forget. Birthdays are a thing we're celebrating. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Maybe in five years. If if you know, COVID isn't so raging. I'll have the dream. Hi, I don't know if I believe on apartment. Yeah, we'll see. We'll see if that happens again. Time will tell. Okay, we're gonna move on to our next segment. And this is where I tell you or ask you questions about your profile. But basically, I'm going to tell you why I think you chose a photo or a prompt. And then you can tell me really why you did. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, so. So in your bio, you mentioned that you're a scientist. Is this because you know, the whole Bill Nye has on millennial women? Or is it just because that's what you do. When we wait, what about Bill by Bill middle weekend? Okay. Yeah, so millennial women, people my age, I assume? younger and older. Like Bill Nye the Science Guy was like a staple in our lives. So if like, I feel like you're like be like, hey, millennial women, I understand you cuz I am like Bill Nye, the Science Guy. That's like, that's like connecting the people's childhoods and that feels weird in my dating profile. I've literally never thought about that. I think like one message you like said something like you called me like, Gareth, a science time that gave me like, Bill. Yeah, besides that lives, and I was like, Okay. The thing about us millennial women is we love nostalgia. So anything that that like, I don't know, connects us to our the 90s were like, yes. And he's such a cool guy. Now. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. But I get I guess it could just be my brain. Yeah. I didn't like watch a whole lot of Bill Nye. So I don't know that much about him. Nor do I like follow him now. But like, yeah, you must have gone to a good school. I watched so much. I liked a lot of Bill Nye and in elementary. That was your school. that basically like that's the most memorable part of like science class in elementary it was watching Vilnai. So honestly, it's impressive that you like even remember anything from elementary school? What's the iShares? Oh, I do. I do the 90s were I remember we had the, if you got your reading done, you got to play on the computers. That was like the best day of my life. I'll remember is that Did you ever do like the typing skills program where like, You got to like the type of word and or like shoot a missile to like, Sue save Earth? No, no, ours was like, our keyboarding class was like, in seventh grade. And it was boring. And we had this like, really old lady. And it's like, she doesn't even know computers, but I don't know, she might have I was just, you know, 13 little jerk. But so it's really because you're a scientist. And you probably just want to tell people, that's what you do. Right? Yeah, I think I feel like it's like an interesting bit about me that like kind of makes me different from other people. I don't I don't feel like there's a whole scientist like walking around. You know, there. There isn't so far. The other scientists I know. He's my pen pal from Canada. And I roped him into doing my podcast. And he was like, okay, he reluctantly agreed. Okay, he is actually pen pals are great. Everyone go get yourself a pen, pal. He's like my but yeah, what do you literally need like a pen pal? Like you write like hand like, like written notes or like text. So basically, there's this app called slowly. And it was right when COVID happened. And basically, I write one code the weekend, the week that COVID shut everything down. My job was like, Oh, cool. Sia, you're not working here anymore. So I was like, it was like, weird. Yeah, it sucked. It was a, it was a bad time. So basically, I was like, I'm gonna get a pen pal. And hopefully, I get like a really old lady from like, Italy, and she's gonna change my life. There's no older people on it. But it's basically just, it's this app called slowly. And it's kind of like handwritten letters. Because depending on where you are, it will take a certain amount of time to get there. Because they want to make it seem like you're sending letters. Yeah. So it was like that. And then I stopped doing it after a while, because just there was just weird people that were like, Hey, I'm gonna send you a picture of where I live. And then it was like selfies. And I was like, I feel like we are all different. We're not on the same station. But this my pen pal. Yeah, he, he's just like, we don't know. It's cool to just like, write to somebody. And we've been doing it for like two years now. And we just like watch shows and talk about them. So everybody goes. Yeah. So if you want pen pal, do it. I highly recommend it. Yeah, I'm done with like, the selfies and whatnot. But like, yeah, you you it's hit or miss. If he's Canadian. I felt like, it depends where you year ago, I opened it to the world. And some of them. Yeah, I don't know. Can I ask because you mentioned you know, these people just like sending you selfies of themselves. Yeah. And I'm curious about your perspective about this. Like I recently I was introduced to the idea that on Craigslist, people will like to take, hey, I'm looking to rent my room in my house to you, but like, I want you to be like my live in girlfriend and I think feel like just like fits in the same realm of like, people suddenly like dick pics, or like, unspools Yeah, like selfies, like, what? What is your opinion about why do people do this? Like, I just don't? I don't understand. It's like, it's madness. I think the Craig's likes thing. I mean, I would assume that it would be like they want. I don't I think that was like apps and like, these kinds of situations is that it's sometimes difficult to differentiate between like a romantic partner and friends. And so like, if you're on the app, or if you're Craigslist, like you just automatically know if somebody's like, in it for the romantic aspect. But honestly, what I, I've learned from the apps from previous times using them for actual dating, is that you it's, I automatically become friends with people. So it doesn't matter. For dating, for dating, and it's Dale, you still are end up being in the friendzone. And that's fine. But I don't know, I think it's just like people don't know how to interact with people anymore. So it's just like, This is what I want. It's just like drawing a boundary or like making Yeah. All right. I think I mean, that makes that's what I think. But I don't like it. I wish. I don't know. I, I don't know, the thing that's weird is like, I suppose wild that people are, are just like expecting romance from a stranger. That's what's weird to me. Because that's, that's why I never was successful with dating apps that I became their friends. Because I'm just I have to be friends with somebody before. I'm like, let's do the romance. People. I think that makes it like, any of these, like, friendships that turn into anything like romantic because I don't know, I feel like if you're if your heart's in it to like, I want to find somebody to like, date long term, but like friendship is a part of that. And like that makes more sense as like a first step than like actual, like, romance, I guess. Yeah. Because you don't know. I mean, you don't know that person. And I guess that's what dates are for, but there's just so much pressure. Yeah, I think. I don't know. Yeah, like, Okay, we've been on three dates. So like, what now? What's nap? Yeah. Yeah, it's, it's wild. And I'm very bad at like, I'm very bad at reading signs. So like, Google, like, give me a sign. And I don't get that it's supposed to be like, sexy. And then I'm like, I don't know. And then I like make it into a joke because it makes me feel weird. And then they're like, oh, okay, this is not going how I expected? No, I think 100% Like, get on board with that. My my, my ex girlfriend would always get angry at me because like, I would take like, intense like, intimate, serious moments. And I make a joke out of it. And she's like, You never let anything be special. Funny. It's called. deflection. Yeah, sometimes it's you gotta you gotta put some lightness into the heavens. I don't know. I'm the same way. I'm the same way. So I get it. Okay. Next. Okay. You mentioned that you quit your job because you didn't want to be stuck in the middle of nowhere state and I just want to know why you don't think Utah is a middle of nowhere. So I felt like we're very middle No, of nowhere state. Okay, have you ever lived anywhere besides Utah? For a long term now, only Utah. Okay, I think this is like, okay, so like being here. I've been here since May. And so I can like kind of, like, understand the sense that like, particular areas that you live in Utah, it could feel like the middle of nowhere, but like, I spent five years in Iowa, like, the person that it's all relative. And like, I was literally dead as the middle of nowhere where like, you have nothing to do but like hanging out in cornfields? Yeah, then you'd like you'd come and visit Salt Lake City where like, you have like the mountains and like all this like cool, outdoorsy shit to do. It feels very different to me is I think it's just like, I've like spent most of my life in the bowels of America and like, it just feels so wonderful when I come here that it was worth Yeah. Have you been so I mean, I was not a I rich YUTAN so I felt like there's the like wealthy Utahns that are like the mountain Utahns that's what I call them more they like can afford going skiing and all that stuff. And then I was like, the poor you talons where we would go to the desert because it was like free at the time. I feel like now you have to get like passes and shit which is so depressing. But yeah, so I don't like ski or is I'm like that i i Never was I never did that as a kid but southern you I guess I could get it but most people I guess now there's a lot of tourists these tourist stuff of the desert. But when I was a kid like nobody gave a shit. Yeah, now people are starting to be like, Oh, Utah is cool, which is the best for people liked to be in a desert by themselves. Yeah. I've had friends who've lived here for the past four years and they tell me like how much Utah they saw it changes just to change like that timespan, so I can't eat Imagine going farther out and like everybody flocking here, as I really just like, influence things. Yeah, have you so have you gone to Southern Utah yet? Have you gone to experience? Like, the me? What uh, I've been to the National Parks down there. And Bryce, but I haven't like been properly hanging out like in the desert desert. It's always been like, yeah, yeah. You got it. Yeah, so yeah, it's starting to get less fun. My The thing is my dad's very outdoorsy guy, so he still knows like the places to go where nobody, because it's like intense. So it's like you have to backpack two days to get there. Instead of like, Arches National Park, everybody goes and sees Delicate Arch. And when I was a kid, it was like, nobody was the I pictures of me. What's nobody around? And now you go there. And it's like an anxiety attack because kids are running around are gonna fall into the pit. And I like, we're the parents to these children. But yeah, there's still cool part. You got to first hit like the big major. Like, if you go anywhere that has tourist areas, you got to do that. And then you can go to like, I don't know Escalante, if it doesn't, you know, get destroyed, or sold. Give you can you help me understand that? What is the big draw to like, going and camping out in the desert for like, a couple of days, because I've only done it for like one day, and I'm just kind of like, okay, so the ground is hard. There's some plants. I got my car and like that's like it. I mean, I suppose you can like, do whatever you want. And like, my bad day, like going out and like dropping a bunch of acid and like hanging out for a few days. I mean, that's what a lot of people do like mushrooms and like, go so me. I I agree that just going and like camping somewhere and then just going on day hikes feels pointless to me. Because I don't find like sleeping in a tent, all that fun. Like, I'd rather go to, like stay in an Airbnb and then like, go on day hikes and that stuff. But it's also just like, my, that's just my dad. Like, that's just what we did. Because we didn't have like money to go spend on a hotel we had. I had four kids in my family. So yeah, so that, that makes more sense. But as an adult, I'm like, No, I'm gonna go sleep on a nice bed and then go on day hikes I get but like, there's something about like backpacking, that's just more, I don't know, you have to carry all your stuff. And it's like, you feel cool. Look at me. And it's like you like a cop, you have a goal. So it's like, if you're going on a big backpacking trip, you have a goal at the end. And that makes more sense to me than just going in. And like, I don't know, there's just something cool about it. But now that I'm older, I get way more afraid of everything. Like when I camp, it's too quiet. And I am there was one time fee, my sister were in a tent. And I like got suddenly anxious and I could hear my heartbeat in my ear. Because I was laying down and I was like there's a bear sniffing our tent. I can hear it. But it was just my it was my own heartbeat and my ear so I don't know. I think it's just like a weird. Like, for me. It's just like a weird like, I grew up doing it and so I feel obligated to do it. If I'm with my dad, there's no way we're gonna go get a hotel room somewhere. But yeah, as an adult. I'm like, You know what? That's pretty cool to sleep in a bed and shower. So I think I agree with you there like I like the backpacking trips. Like have a point. It makes sense. Yeah. But yeah, but like the tent sleeping is terrible. Like I've never had an issue. It's not great. No, yeah. And then I just can't imagine like, Okay, I'm gonna spend three days in the same spot in the desert like that just sounds really boring. And and there's always a lot of people like at the campsite that you go to now there's always so many people around so it's not like you're in you're like hanging out in nature by yourself. So it's just weird. Yeah. Okay, so I asked this to everybody who has a wedding photo. Because every I feel like it's like a you are obligated to share a wedding photo and is it because you want to show that you look good and Asou? Like explain, explain. This to me. Yeah, I don't know like exactly what my Russia I think maybe for me like it was probably just like a good photo. I don't have a lot of photos of myself. And so like, that's like one source of like having me like, yeah, yeah, just like the fucking 40 year old, like, Boomer version of me like trying to take a selfie of myself. Yeah, that makes sense. You feel like it's less natural. I don't know why. But men just don't take selfies as much as girls do. And so it's like, I feel like it's an opportunity. People are just snapping photos of you. You're in a zoo, so you gotta put it on. Why else am I going to a wedding? If not for the photo for my profile? Honestly, like I don't know if it's my brother's wedding that good for him. But yes, exactly. I'm kind of pissed because my sister I officiated her wedding. And they didn't really have a photographer. And I was like, this could have been my calling card. And I don't even have a photo to show off people how good I am. There's a photo of you officiating? No, there's like one, but it's just Hi. No, no, it's not great. So I don't share it. Well, how was your only one? Like were the I feel like because I'd be snapping photos is like the happening? I agree. But they didn't hire like a professional photographer. They just had one of the guests who happens to have a good camera, like take pictures. So like, they're not he didn't we don't have like very many candid photos because he was partying, which makes sense. So okay, yeah, it's like, yeah, okay. Well, this has to do with the zombie apocalypse. So you explain your plan for the zombie apocalypse? Is it because that that doesn't seem too far fetched from our reality? In since COVID times, I feel like yeah, zombies could happen. And it would be like that makes sense. And they did you do because you want us to know that you have a plan. I heard you survive. Would you survive a zombie apocalypse? Is that what you're saying? Yeah, it was really about me, like bragging about my survivability, like the long term trajectory of my lifespan. Should there be a zombie apocalypse? That's pretty good. Okay, yeah, it's, um, so I it's like, there was like, a time like my friends and I that we got together and we're like, okay, so if one of us has dated somebody, like, what are the things that we want them to be like, beat into or like, sort of, like make them like qualified to be like, part of the Friendship Circle and like, one of them is like having some sort of like thoughts about the zombie apocalypse. And just like being naked, that kind of, like, open weird to be okay with, like talking about it. And so that's like, kind of why, why that's on there. Because it's kind of like a ridiculous thing they talk about if like, you're too cool to talk about the zombie apocalypse. Like, I don't I don't talk to be funny. Like, I'm not going to be interested. Yeah, I guess. Yeah. What if their plan was like, well, whatever happens? Like I've been terrible at it. I don't like the idea. And I don't like the answer, like, oh, I'll just die. Okay, great. Like, that's all you have to say about this. I think that I would, I would first of all, go find cool outfits. And just like, because I assumed that, like places are not functioning like they want and I bet I'm going to just wear whatever I want and do whatever I want. And, you know, hopefully I thrive if I don't. Hopefully, somebody will take care of take care of you. I'm gonna be honest, if there's a zombie apocalypse, I don't want him to smash a zombie. I want somebody else to do it for me. And that's my reality. Okay? Unless it's gonna come after me. Unless it's like mashing at my face. Obviously, I'm going to protect myself. Okay. survival instinct there. Okay, I'm curious, like, why? I have so many questions about why is like your first impulse to like, I'm gonna go like, get new outfits. Like because when I here's the sake, I assume if it's a zombie apocalypse, it's like you're kind of prepared for like, the end of your life. Kind of like you're like I'm going to be I'm going to just like, do what I would do if I was an older person. And when I'm an old lady The I'm gonna just like go fucking wild. I'm gonna wear you know crazy outfits and I'm gonna just be like I don't give a shit about anything because it's like, the end of your life I'm kind of going with a mentality of like, you're kind of like prepared to probably die at some point so why not like dress like Celine Dion? Okay, do you feel like that makes sense? I'm glad that you've said Celine did I'd say I don't know for some reason I was like, she's gonna go get one of those old timey like prisoner outfits with the black and white stripes. What do you say you know if I felt called to it I would do i but maybe I would like glue some cool like eyeballs on it or something? No, I was like googly eyes. Yeah. Okay, follow up question to the zombie what is Fort Mackinac? Because I don't know what that is. Is that a good place to go? Are you telling it like giving us a signal like everybody had to this place? That's a good point. Maybe I shouldn't have that on so I'm really kind of like closing competition. Yeah, it's like what my friends that I have agreed upon for like, this is what we're all meeting at for Makena and it's like this old timey like civil war. It's on an island it has walls like it just like we gotta get dummies have to get through the water over the walls if they like want to like eat you and like it's defensible. It's not like cannons on it already. So like your fuck around? Yeah, okay. Well, hopefully not too many. Just kidding. We want lots of people will listen to this podcast, baby. Well believe out the name of it. Makena not Mackinac. Yeah, that's a Yeah, it's a Michigan like, it's how you the timing true Michiganders from like, people who don't live in Michigan is like one of them. Yeah. Yep, that makes sense. Okay. You have a photo of yourself eating a burger. Is this to show that even though you're a scientist, you can hang with us? normies I don't know why I feel like for some reason in my brain, it's like scientists don't eat burgers, but they do. Honestly, I think it like a little bit yet. So I think that that photo like actually captures my personality. Like, it was like literally like five minutes before my friend's wedding. And I was like, I gotta go get some barbecue and like yeah, I'm like trying to eat this like messy barbecue sandwich and like not give it like all over myself. And this picture I'm like, this actually shows like who I am with like an opposition to like all this other like this, like fancy wedding photo and like, I'm a scientist and blah, blah, blah like that, actually. Yeah, like shows who I am. That makes sense. Yeah. And you're like wearing I was wondering because it didn't look like super cold and you're like wearing as your jacket zipped all the way up. But that makes sense. Because you're hot. You're protecting your clothes. So you're just also shows that you're smart. There you go. I've lived I want to believe that was my thinking it was also cold. Okay, but let's commit Yeah, I was just being smart. Yeah, yeah. Okay, here's our last question about your profile. Okay. For some reason, I was like entranced by the photo of you, which seems like you're you're so you're taking picture of yourself in a mirror but there also appears to be a mirror behind you. And I was like, This is why or do you have two mirrors facing each other but also it's like smart because me I don't like look at my butt very often. But if I had two mirrors facing really smart simple 360 Mu Yeah. I am. So that's what's happening right it's two mirrors facing each other. Because I'd like to see if a photo of like his like countertop I was yeah, I looked at it for way too long. That's fine. What's happening there? I really I don't even remember I think my thinking was is this is like one of the most like recent photos of me I like Yeah, I think so. I once I make a profile I they can refuse to look at it again. Because it just like gives me anxiety to think of like advertising myself. And I think I when I like made I was like okay, here's like a photo of the in like clothes that I still own and He's like, relatively recent in here. Me from like, top to bottom. Yeah, like honestly, I'm like internally cringing, just like thinking about the fact that I have this photo on my profile right now. It's like, it's like, if you ever so I have tried to I mean, I've cast things for like short films and stuff. And it's like, so if you are a, like, do lots of advertisements and you're an actor you like, basically you say how tall you are. And then the camera will pan up and down your body. That's kind of like that. It's like, here's my audition. I'm not catfishing you. This is me and my clothes. And my ass apparently I've never thought Yeah, you can't see it. You couldn't really see it. But then it was like, I don't know. You can see that. It's like repeating multiple times, which happens when you put mirrors like that. I don't know. I was very, I was very like I was I don't think I don't think you really have to worry about most women. Looking at that photo me like to see him to mirrors. What is happening here. That's perfect. I'm gonna go to his house. And look at my but I don't want to for myself. So like, yeah, so I need to, I need to match with this guy. So eventually, I can go to his house and check myself out. Yeah. It's perfect. Perfect. Okay. Now I'm going to ask you, do you have any bad date stories? Usually, I mean, it doesn't have to necessarily be the apps but I just feel like apps are like, where bad date stories are born? Because like, you don't know this person. Let's hear it. I know you haven't. I can't I don't think I have anything that's like interestingly, like, oh, I went out on a date with this person. And it was bad. I think the court ridiculously bad things have happened to be while like dating somebody. And it's a good bad dating story in that sense, but it's kind of like tangential to like, oh, I went on this like really this week weirdly bad date with somebody. I feel like most of my dates tend to be like relatively, like, normal when like nothing happens. I don't really have like great stories that we know what, that's what I am learning about this. Like, I think that I just really have terrible luck because I have so many like I have a roster of just like bizarre dates. And I'm like, what? Most people don't experience this. What is wrong with me? Yeah, I don't know. I feel like men are the source of big may are bad dates. Like I love talking to people about like their bad deeds because I do ridiculous things that people do. Like I remember like talking to this one moment, and she was telling me about how she went on a first date with a spy. He seemed normal beforehand. He shows up with two day wearing camo yoga pants and Ugg boots. What was your date? I wonder what they were doing? Like that. Was that? Wow. Yeah. Okay, yeah. Forever. I started me. Yeah, we had one bad date. And I think I think the problem the most common problem that happens with what women do is that they cat fish is that they like to update their photos or they use lots of filters. But that doesn't necessarily mean that it's a bad day. It's just like an awkward encounter. And I'm really bad. I'm always afraid. I always make people find me when I ever if I ever meet somebody I've never met before because I'm really bad at like, recognizing, like people I've never met before. I'm always like, freaked out that I'm gonna go to the wrong person and be like, hey, like I am not creating my problem myself. Because what if I accidentally catfish people? I think most people know that they're doing it though. Yeah, probably. I don't know. It's the people who are catfishing it's wild to me that they have the confidence to then meet that person. Like, you know, you're going to be found out at some point. Yeah, maybe they don't realize that they're catfishing like an outdated photo, or? Yeah, I feel like I I changed my hair a lot. So maybe that could consider be considered catfishing. But I don't. I don't know. I'm always like nervous that I'm accidentally Katherine wishing people who knows interest I don't know. I'm not outside my body. I don't see what I look like all the time. I sometimes take pictures and I'm like, does this look like me? I? Who knows, I have like my first I kind of worry about this like, oh my God and my catfishing people like somebody said, like, Oh, you look young for your age and like I am on my pitch. I'm using like, outdated like, maybe I look a lot older now than I actually think I do. Like, kind of a survey a thorough, thorough look for a little. You have to it's like a brings us new, like elements of anxiety like oh shit, do I need to take more? Am I getting old in the past two years? What's happening? Yeah, I don't think I've ever I mean, I guess nobody would have would probably say it to my face if that happened. But who knows? Maybe I tricked some people. Got them all according to my plan. Okay, we're gonna do our next segment, which is, would you rather so I'm going to just ask you some ones that I thought were difficult. And yeah, you you tell me your answer. Okay. Would you rather be reincarnated as a sea creature or an airborne creature? I think an airborne creature. So I think there's more variety if you're able to like fly around and do shit and whereas like the ocean is kind of like this. Predominantly like barren wasteland plus some cool areas. And I don't know that I feel like the only like positive of like being an underwater creatures like, Oh, I get to explore this like vast part of the earth that people don't really know. But I feel like that yeah, part of the Earth is really just like dark water. So your life? Is it? What? Which? Do you have been airborne creature you would choose to be? I don't honestly, I think I have some sort of like bird that can fly long distances without a problem that isn't going to be pegged off by like people hunting it or like other predators would be like, yeah, pretty cool. A middle like, unassuming bird creature. Yeah, like an eye. Raven? Probably. Yeah. People are afraid of them. They'd stay away. They're smart. might get some Yeah. might get some rocks thrown at you because of the movie birds or the ravens, right? No idea. But I think you're right. Those that's a wild movie. I recommend everyone to watch it because I feel like in that time period, they were like, what's the weirdest thing we can make scary. Birds. Weird blob. The blob is the colorful blob. The Blob. Yeah. I feel like it's like Wild Wild Times. Do you remember a tremors? Do you ever tell? Yeah, my brother B that sits out to me from that time period. My brother was so obsessed with that movie. And every year we would drive to Wisconsin, which is like a two hour two day trip from Utah to Wisconsin. And my dad like got this like old TV that I set up and we would watch tremors and like men and black. Because our and our grandparents wouldn't let that us watch them in their house. For some reason. They thought they were like the devil. And they weren't like super religious or anything. It was so weird. My grandma hated men and black and tremors. They did say I think they say son of a bitch like 50 times in that movie. But that movie is great. It's terrified me as a child to like walk on the grass like, oh, yeah, well, I'm only walking on concrete because somehow the worms don't break. Yeah, yep. Yep. It was very terrifying to like you had to it was basically like the floor is love. Because if you stepped on it, and they sensed you, then you'd get eaten up by those. Those guys. Three allergy for it. Yeah. What a great movie Kevin Bacon. Okay, so would you rather lose the ability to lie? Or believe everything you're told? I'd rather lose the ability to lie. I feel like what kind of like ridiculous that people could even be sarcastic with you if you couldn't if you also if you just believed everything like your life would be. I don't know just like a continuous a chaos of like, what? How are you seeing the world? Every? Yeah, like every 10 minutes. you'd change your opinion on something. It would be a whirlwind, especially in this day and age, man. Yeah, especially In this day and age, I'd really be an honest person just a dumb. Yes, like, yeah, yeah, I'm bad at lying anyways, so people, there you go already. I'm already bad at it. Except for like weird things. I can lie about weird things and people. Like I remember one time, I used to work, Urban Outfitters. I was like playing this, like music. And there's this musician called Paolo Nutini. And I was like, yeah, he's my boyfriend. And I felt like I was being very obvious. That was my boyfriend. And like, for like, a couple of weeks, everyone's like, Marta stated, this amazing musician. I was like, wow, I am really good at lying about really, really giant thing. That's amazing. Two weeks of my life. I I was dating this really great musician. I was awesome. How, what inspired you to like, lie about this? I just, I wouldn't lie. It's like a joke to me. Like, I was joking. They're like, Who is this? And I was like, It's my boyfriend, Paulo Nutini and they're like, really? And I was like, yeah, they believe like, it was like, I thought it was being very obvious about I mean, lying. And then it like, went around. And I was like, that's, I really am not. He's from like, he's from Scotland or something. And I've Yeah, it was actually or like, well, it was like a small group of people. And I think eventually, they realized I was joking. Because my best first of all, my best friend worked at at Bear with me, and I think he was like, No, that's not true. She's lying to you. So I think he probably ratted me out. Okay, okay. Last one, would you rather Danny DeVito or Danny Trejo play you in a movie? I really, really liked Always Sunny in Philadelphia. So I would love Danny. Danny DeVito told me that I think he would do a much closer portrayal of me than Yeah, Danny. Danny Trejo is like way too, like, serious and masculine to portray. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like if your life was very like, finding with cool knives, tray hose the guy for you? Yeah, my very far from that. You gotta go with that is like such a great like, polar opposite character. People who have it the same first day. Yeah, like make people choose between. That's dry. No, I did not come up with that. I have to be real with you. Oh, I looked that up on the internet. But that's a great one. And I also would choose Danny DeVito I think he would have similar vibes. Not really, but definitely him. Okay. Next segment. We're gonna, what? What's, uh, what's a dating like, profile red flag for you? If you see anything and you're like, No, immediately we ain't gonna vibe. I think I'm trying to like think of like the best terms to put this into like, anything that gives me vibes of like, extremist spirituality. Okay, like first, like, if you're conservative, like I'm just like, Yeah, I can't. But then like, that's like an automatic rule out that's like very black and white to me. But then like, I get streamis Spirituality where you're on the spectrum of like modern medicine is like out to like, get you and take advantage of you and like we should only be like praying to our ancestors and like eating vegetables so they cure all of our ailments is like I don't know there's just like an element to it. That when it's a too far that I'm like, No, I can't. Yeah. Which is I think more of an issue in Utah than like I've lived anywhere else because like there's a decent group of like hippie dippie type people. I don't I think like if you want to charge your crystals and or the full moon go for it, but if you think that that's going to heal, you're like ailment, I would consider pairing that with some science, but that's just me. Yes, exactly. That charging your crystals like when crystals get to be mentioned. I'm like, I am not at home out here is that I feel like that's a very it's like a younger person thing. Maybe not actually I know a lot of people who are my age that do that, but I felt like, like Gen Z made it cool. I don't know. This could just be me. I could make you be making this all Look, I don't know. Yeah, that makes. Yeah, I don't know, either. I don't know who charges or crystals. I don't want to be associated. That makes sense. Yeah. Yep. Anything else that? Yeah, I feel like okay, so let's take that. And then like, I don't even know how to like, properly articulate this. But like, sometimes you look through somebody's profile, and you get the sense of like I don't think basicness is like the correct term for this. But, like, very this person exemplifies, like, traditional gender norms. And I'm just, I'm not interested in this, like, yeah, none of us like it feels to me. So I feel like those are the two things so like, you're very traditional person or like, you're very like, out there spiritual person. And I'm piecing out just don't Yeah, works for some people doesn't work for you. Yeah, I. Yeah. Okay. Any other red flags? You feel like sharing or should we move on to the green flags? Those are more fun. I feel like there are other red flags, but I can't think of him at the moment. Okay, yeah. Thank you. Well, what about green flags? Like something that's like, automatically you're like, yes, we're in love. Anything. Anything that displays like them being weird, or like witty like that, for me is like, criteria number one for like me being able to, like be romantically interested in somebody. Like you have to like have this like additional like, weird witty edge to yourself, or like, I just Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if this is like getting bored or like what it is like, that's, like, so important to me that that's, I don't know if that's a green flag, actually. But it's something that is a green flag to me. Yeah, I think that it's very easy as a woman to like, you know, exactly what I know what kind of like pictures and stuff like I would get the most swipes on. And so I think that probably it's like, oh, this person's not just like here to get like, a confidence boost, maybe. And I think I think that makes sense to me. Because, yeah, it's very, I feel like, I know people who are like, I'm feeling bad about myself. Let me just like, hurry and get some likes. On my on my dating profile. I mean, it's a weird boost. Like when you like it, it's a lot easier for women. I know that. So I do know, there's lots of people out there that are just like, I just need some people to think I'm hot for a few minutes and then go on with my life. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. I mean, definitely, like it's like, nice to like, feel desired by other people. But like, yeah, then maybe it's like the authenticity component of it. Like when you see somebody like being weird on their profile, like, Okay, you're being authentic and you don't give a shit. Like what other people are like looking for? Yeah, and that I feel like that goes. Yeah, that makes sense. Also, with, with dudes, you can definitely see there's like, a, I don't know, theme. Men know what they what women? Well, I don't know if they actually know what women like I read an article we don't wait, what do you have? What? What do you see this men like? Wanting from women, or they perceive? Well, I can them. So I read this. Yeah, so I read this article. And it's very, very true that men when they set up their their profiles, except I feel like nobody that has been on the podcast really follows this. So. But men lots of times will create their profiles, not in the seeing, like being desired by women, but like displaying a sort of male power dynamic. So it's like they post things that it's like, oh, I'm like the best man. And I'm competing with all these other men. So I've got to be be more powerful than them instead of being like, Oh, I'm actually this is for women. And I know like, these are the photos that will show that I'm like a better partner. So that makes sense. So they pick pictures based off what they think is going to be competitive against other men, instead of being like, here's me and why it would make a good partner for a woman. Yeah. Interesting, and which makes sense. And I feel like women probably do the same thing. Like instead of showing their like, real, authentic selves. we're like, oh, there's so many other women on here. So I have to like pick my hottest picture or whatever. So it's just like an interesting thing. But I think most I mean, I have yet to have somebody who's like that Jim, bro who's like, give me your Snapchat on the podcasts. They're not interested on podcast, as it turns out, but yeah, I think just like, showing a personality and not like caring really, like if you're, like, strong and tall. And, and I don't know, whatever else men are trying to vie. Yes, that's really interesting, because I feel like, there have definitely been moments where like, I like wonder like, what do you like other men's profiles? Like look like? And how do I like match up for that? And like, I've definitely have had moments at times where I've like, tried to like, think about like, how do I like change this to like, stand out from other people. But I feel like that's just like one part of it, as opposed to like, the entire dominating force is like making myself seem taller and more powerful. Yeah. I also think I also think that it's different when I think that when men actually write bios that aren't like, there's a weird thing that happens, where it's like men telling women what not to be, instead of telling women, what they're like, so be like, if you do this, then get out of here. And why do women do that? Like, it's very strange, like, how often men like will name things that's wrong with us, instead of being like, hey, here's me, here's what I like to do. So it's just a while it's a wild ride. So if you have, I feel like first of all, having like, an interesting bio that like is trying to be, like, show who you are, I think it's a very standout quality. That's a very, that's honestly the kind of a depressing statement. If, if you have a profile that's actually trying to talk about, like who you are as a human being, like, you're really standing up to standard women. It's, I mean, it's sad and but true. And so that's just the reality. You have to I mean, yeah, that's the truth. What a worldly and maybe, I don't know maybe it's just a Utah thing, but I don't think it's just a Utah thing. I think it's an everywhere thing. Okay, any other green flags you feel like talking about? Yeah, I like it when people like you mentioned something about valuing, like open communication or like honesty or like emotional vulnerability that like I feel like for me that like to tell like either this person has, like, experience like this is like a good thing to have or it's been a situation where like, they've realized like, this is fucking terrible to not have any relationship and like realize that like, moving forward like if I'm gonna be in any sort of like, stable, meaningful relationship like these seem to be like things that be there they can they I guess it's kind of like, putting out there like, you want like, the foundational aspects of a relationship and like seeing people Yeah, about them. It's like, yeah, like, I'm glad you recognize that because that's also what I want and like, let's Yeah, hopefully have that together or something. Yeah, if they're already off the bat, like ready to be open with you, that's always good. So you're not one sided on that, which can be scary. Yeah, and I don't know, but I feel like there's there is like a little bit of like, being too open, like, I don't know, understanding like the balance and like, versus reciprocity. There's like an important thing being somebody like, here's everything about me all at once is also kind of like there's something like that it's stable about unsayable about, yep. Okay, are you ready for our last question, and then hanging up on you? All right after you answer it. Yeah, you may think that I'm kidding, but I'm going to thank God finally done. No, no, no. Okay, good. Are you in love with me now? Be honest, I have to be honest here. I'm not I'm not in love with you now. Yet you can't get them all. See What a guy that Garrett guy the science guy doesn't work as well as Bill Nye the Science Guy cuz I don't know Garrett's last name. Anyways, we're gonna call Garrett original Garrett because we have another Garrett later on in the season. And this Garrett, I interviewed first so he's original Garrett sorry other Garrett. Anyways, I think that we all should band together and convince original Garrett to do some sort of voice acting. That guy is such an interesting voice. I love it. If you love it, you know what you can do? You can contact me on our social media and be like, Yeah, let's make this happen for Garrett. If you're interested in doing that, the social medias is in the description. Anyways, we're gonna finish off this episode with a quote from a magazine in the Victorian era. And they asked spinsters why they were single. Here's a reason why one of them was single. Because men are like bad deserts. Here's the quote. Because men like three corner charts, they are very pleasing to the eye, but on closer inspection prove hollow and stale. You got that right, Victorian era spinster. Anyways, I hope you guys have a good week and are just jonesing for next week's episode because we're having a fun time. So see you next week. Bye. Bye.